c/o patrickÂ
A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, “Hey, this is a coincidence. We both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?”
The other guy says, “Well, it just happened. It was a tongue twister accident.
See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, Id like two tickets to Pittsburgh, I accidentally said Id like two pickets to Tittsburgh., so she socked me a good one.”
The first guy replied, “Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife, Please pour me a bowl of Frosties, honey.
But I accidentally said, “You’ve ruined my life, you evil, self-centered, fat-assed bitch.”
oh man. so remember how i said it wasn’t windy or anything yesterday when it was supposed to be? turns out it got windy after the wind advisory expired. bullshit, i say! not really much to say today. nothing going on..new receptionist sucks. she’s got this brilliant thing where she’ll call me, but she won’t say anything when i answer for around 10 seconds. i’d hung up on her 3-4 times before i realized what was going on. i guess she just doesn’t know that when the other party answers, you’re supposed to say something.
in other news. woot-off today until midnight
